So society and everything in it has pissed us over right? Made us feel crappy, unworthy, insecure and everything in-between. So like… why don’t we take our securities into our own hands? The media is often blamed for feeding us insecurities on a platter (which they do have fault for) …but I should have some control over my insecurities right?
So growing up, I was always quite insecure, I found validation through the words of others, I had an ‘easily-influenced-people-pleaser’ nature. I am seeing that it’s all very related to my misplaced identity. But I think I’m getting to a point (“getting” – not there yet but bear with me in this process lol) where I’m getting tired of being very ‘to-and-fro’ based upon my perception of what others did, said or expected of me, how I should dress, how I should behave, if I should wear make-up (or nah) etc.
OKAY, SO TAKE APPEARANCE FOR EXAMPLE…
My theory of physical appearance insecurities has 70/30% thing going on right? So around 30% of it, I think, comes from there being such a harsh concept of what beauty is, so because we all want to identify as being ‘beautiful’, it’s only natural that we try to conform to those popular ideas. But that makes it hard to deviate from the popular ideas of beauty. The 70% is made up by us attempting to fulfil, or conform rather, to what and who we see ‘beauty’ or ‘attractive’ labelled as. Which isn’t all that bad.. but the problem lies within our states of minds.
With all the pressures of society, bodily pressures, personality pressures, materialistic pressures, right down to the pressures of expectations of the people around us, it’s unhealthy (and tots crazy) to pursue external beautifications if we don’t have the correct foundation established. Like yes, I be slaying when I’ve done my contouring and highlighting (lol joke, I’m not that skilled), if I’m going to wear make-up, I need to have that security to know that I am amazing, beautiful, be like yaaaaaassssssss whenever I take a look in the mirror (lmao), because make up can be strong promoter of insecurities.
Okay, so you’re going to do something with me quickly yeah? We’re gonna take ‘Intentionality’ and handcuff it to our wrists! *inserts warrior emoji here*. So we’ve got to intentionally and actively work to achieve all of these things, like the other week I realised how much the good ol’ mirror declarations work, telling myself, declaring to myself my importance, intelligence, ability, beauty etc. I’m even coming to see how my insecurities are more so distorted perceptions of ‘not good enough’ and comparisons. Because after years of believing lies about myself, I am choosing to believe that I was beautiful, significant, loved, worthy and everything else (also a process haha). It’s not a bad thing to pursue external methods of ‘improving yourself’ but its detriment if you have an insecure state of mind. Change your mind = change you.
Until we get to that point, a lot of things that people say around us can and will sway us like a boat in the middle of the pacific and that is not fun, trust me (…not that I’ve been stranded in the middle of the pacific ocean haha). But dude, solidify your foundation, I owe it myself, you owe it to yourself, we owe it to ourselves *flicks hair* we are so worth it.